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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22553497">Sa'yo</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/aseocheviix/pseuds/aseocheviix'>aseocheviix</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dead Kids (2019)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - College/University, Conyo dialogue, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, English language tag BUT:, English narration, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares, Plot With Porn, Song fic, Taglish dialogue, no it's not porn with plot, non-explicit mention of sexual assault, vanilla sex</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 09:55:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,653</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22553497</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/aseocheviix/pseuds/aseocheviix</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It was cheesy, it was; maybe even terribly cliche. Yet he giggled giddily, a fond and teary smile shared between them. Coming of age romance film or not, this was their reality.</p><p>Charles’ smile was the brightest against his lips, and so was Gideon’s.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Charles Blanco/Gideon Uy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Sa'yo</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Finally, I wrote a fic of my actual OTP, hahaha! This is the reason why 'di ko ginagawa 'yung Sta. Blanco fic. I was trying to perfect this, and it's still not perfect enough, pero mahal ko 'to. Also, Gid's made-up Kuya Angelo is 10 years older kaya siya nagpakasal habang HS pa lang si Gideon, haha</p><p>Sa'yo by Silent Sanctuary is available on Spotify and Youtube</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>Umaabante, umaatras, kilos mong namimintas…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Kung tunay nga ang pag-ibig mo…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Kaya mo bang isigaw, iparating sa mundo?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>— –</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon’s parents would regularly leave many times within the year on business trips, meaning he’d be left in the darkness of an empty home. Before, he never minded it, having an older brother for company; but ever since his Kuya Angelo moved out with his wife, he had no one. The darkness never used to bother him, either. Not until that day when he was 12, during a family reunion at their province. Truthfully, he wasn’t so familiar with the rest of his family and relatives, despite meeting them every other year. That year, he became unwillingly familiar with an aunt—god knows from whose side she was.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>In the dark of the small guest room he stayed by himself, the door had crept open in the middle of the night. The moonlight accentuated sharp features above him, but still very unclear ones through his terrible vision. The woman’s tough grip was bruising on his small arms and </span>
  <em>
    <span>body </span>
  </em>
  <span>and</span>
  <em>
    <span> hair and mouth </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>and</em>
  </b>
  <span>—</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Gideon couldn’t ever speak a word of it to anyone. Not a fucking breath of it went out of that room, until, soon enough, Charles knew.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles Blanco fell under the list of people Gideon would give if someone asked him who were the smartest he knew. It happened during one of their sleepovers at his house, and their other best friend, Paolo Gabriel was absolutely unconscious and snoring by then. Only a streetlight lit up the room, through somewhat thick curtains that barely let it in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It felt like that night when he was 12, the memory still terribly fresh in his mind at 13. The thin blanket draped over him dragged across his bare skin uncomfortably, him having accidentally brought boxers instead of proper pajamas. The phantoms from the past year pulled him into a frightening abyss, and the ceiling lamp above him looked like it had sharp yet unclear features.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon was trembling, and Charles heard the sobs that escaped him that night.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uy…?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The hand to his shoulder surprised Gideon, and he’d nearly screamed. The blur of his tears warbled the image of Charles’ worried and scared expression. They stared at each other, frozen, both hesitating to move. Only the sound of Gideon’s heavy breaths filled the room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“… Gid…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Later on, he’d be in Charles’ arms, with the both of them struggling. Charles was trying his best to ground Gideon, while Gideon tried his best to stay grounded. Eventually, the worrying sound of hyperventilation replaced with the sound of Charles’ soft singing. His voice was the most beautiful sound to Gideon, and still is to this day. It wasn’t perfectly smooth, but the rapiness was what made it familiar to his heart—as the years followed, it got deeper, and felt warmer and closer to home.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before that time, he’d actually never heard Charles sing; but since then, Gideon noticed that he always seemed to. He would hear him sing idly under his breath, while studying or tapping on his phone. It was also around that time that Charles let his guitar out of his closet after so long collecting dust.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon had always known his aversion towards women, and how it increased tenfold that day when he was 12. Truthfully, since he was 10, he had quite the crush on Charles, and the feelings continued to grow and mature as the years went by. He’d always had trouble dealing with his emotions, and tended to create faces and walls to hide his more genuine self.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles saw past that, and Gideon somehow let him slowly worm his way through; compared to Paolo, who learned to start keeping away if you told him to. Their friend could be a little homophobic at times, but Charles managed to teach him to be more respecting of those matters. They were thankful that his dedication and loyalty to his friends was what made Paolo become understanding. Once, the both of them caught Paolo absentmindedly touching a pin in a store Gideon wanted to go to, flashing colors of blue and pink and purple. But, well, if Paolo preferred not to confront the idea of “the both of them”, then they knew he also preferred them not confronting him about that.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Finding out later on about Gideon’s slight repulsion towards sex, and his appreciation towards gentle touches to ground him, Charles put two and two together very easily. Then, a few years after that, the “hotdog incident” that Chuck would pull later on during Junior year worsened Gideon’s state of mind, and further boiled Charles’ anger. The fleshiness of that cursed food item seemed to do fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span> to remind him of the worst of his days. It didn’t help either that they actually bound him to a chair and covered his eyes, leaving him just as vulnerable as he once was. Asking for better help—for </span>
  <em>
    <span>both</span>
  </em>
  <span> of them—was Janina’s idea, and yielded thankful results.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As the years followed, those kisses over his eyes to relieve Gideon’s tears moved closer to his lips. It was on a day in April, and Gideon stayed at Charles’ place, his own house empty. Paolo was spending the day with his girlfriend Yssa, so it really was just the two of them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His parents were on another trip that week. They were both 16 by then, and Kuya Angelo had already moved out a year ago. Charles started to play his guitar while Gideon worked on his mathematics assignments. Suffice to say, he couldn’t finish it, as the deepening smooth rasp of a voice filled the bedroom. Not to mention how the guy he grew to love was serenading him right then and there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s true that Charles had sung in front of him several times before, but the guitar and bedroom set-up was definitely something else.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon’s attention was completely towards him, and his soul was filled with just Charles’ voice and the warmth it gave him. He watched as he slowly set the guitar down, and moved towards him to grab his hand and pull him up. Soon, they were dancing, and that same song Charles would sing to him surrounded them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Tumingin sa’king mata… Magtapat ng nadarama.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They spun slowly, their faces close and their breaths mingling. Charles’ hand rubbed softly over Gideon’s waist.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>‘Di gusto ika’y mawala, dahil handa akong ibigin ka…</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Their hands tightened their hold with each other, as though the spaces between their fingers were where they were meant to be.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Kung maging tayo, sa’yo lang ang puso ko…</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was </span>
  <em>
    <span>cheesy</span>
  </em>
  <span>, it </span>
  <em>
    <span>was</span>
  </em>
  <span>; maybe even terribly cliche. Yet he giggled giddily, a fond and teary smile shared between them. Coming of age romance film or not, this was their reality.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles’ smile was the brightest against his lips, and so was Gideon’s.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>— –</span>
</p><p>
  <span>So Gideon’s parents were out of the country again, and his memory haunted him once more. He was yet to move into his new apartment much closer to his university, having only realized the trouble of the distance in the middle of his first year. Relapses were always part of the arrow forward, however, and picking up the pieces was normal, because progress was different for each person after all. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Everyone</span>
  </em>
  <span> had their ups and downs. It had been a long while since the panic and trauma had last set in, though, and it was like a slap to the face that night.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles was, luckily, there with him in bed. It was deep into the night, and for whatever reason, Gideon had a nightmare and woke up drenched in sweat. The nightmare wasn’t related to that day when he was 12, but the panic set all over his body and mind from his jolt awake, and suddenly it </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>that day when he was 12. His breathing quickened, and he desperately grabbed at the pillows to ground him. He pushed his back against the bed, trying hard to rid the creeping feeling behind him. His chest felt tight, and seemed to keep winding tighter as a pitchy ringing clouded his hearing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Amidst his ministrations was when Charles woke up and immediately sprung. A wide palm cupped Gideon’s cheeks, and wiped the tears streaking it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gid. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Gid</span>
  </em>
  <span>, nandito lang ako. Gideon, what do you need?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon’s eyes were wide when he opened them and stared back at Charles, his breaths still harsh. He made a grab at his shirt and arm, his eyes still boring against his. Trembling, he pulled his boyfriend closer, and grabbed at him tightly. Charles pulled him closer as well, moving them both up to sit on the bed. His grip was just as tight, knowing that Gideon needed the touch and the warmth, and he rubbed his hand over the curve of his back to give more warmth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ch— </span>
  <em>
    <span>Charles</span>
  </em>
  <span>…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you need?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His nails slightly tore the back of Charles’ shirt from Gideon’s tight grip, and the sleeves grew wet with his tears. Charles hands were still rubbing warmth into his back, meanwhile. His body was still trembling as a soft kiss pressed against Gideon’s temple, and the tip of his ear. It made him move ever closer into the warmth his boyfriend radiated. He felt the feeling in his chest loosen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon’s voice was weak, and followed by short shallow breaths. He was very vulnerable that way, and sounded scared beyond relief. It scared Charles, as well, because he knew this same vulnerability through anger. Gideon was amazing at handling it, easily dodging the chances of Charles’ more physical anger, and instead going straight at the source. The process was long, as well, and they were there for each other through every step. Therapy; therapy was important—no matter how vague Gideon would be, or how proud Charles could be, they helped them learn ways to center. They helped them in ways that let the both of them eventually help each other as well, to the best of their abilities, and to be better for each other.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A soft rumble shook them both lightly as Charles began to mumble a familiar song.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Walang ibang tatanggapin… Ikaw at ikaw pa rin…</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Its melody slowed down their time, and Gideon began to breathe better, his breaths deliberately deepening, and his grip around Charles loosened. More kisses pressed against the side of his face as the hand that rubbed his back slowed as well.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>May gulo ba sa ‘yong isipan…</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A hand idly moved to the back of Gideon’s neck as he began to nuzzle against the crook of Charles’ jaw. Their breaths both evened out, and they felt each other’s heartbeats from the closeness of their chests.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The ringing in his ears stopped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>…‘Di tugma sa nararamdaman.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Soon, the warmth that enveloped them both became less stifling, and Gideon’s mind focused on the gentle touches. It calmed the storm of thoughts, and reminded him that </span>
  <em>
    <span>someone was there</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and that he was </span>
  <em>
    <span>home</span>
  </em>
  <span>, and that he was </span>
  <em>
    <span>safe </span>
  </em>
  <span>now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The hand against his back paused.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“…Gid.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A kiss pressed warmly against Charles’ neck.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I need </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Charles.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon lifted his head off the crook of Charles’ neck, and their gazes locked with each other. A hand went up to cup his face again, and their lips met, warm against each other—Gideon’s were soft while Charles’ was a little dry. Their teeth accidentally clicked when they deepened their kiss, and warmth turned to heat when their tongues touched.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles lightly pushed Gideon back against the bed, only parting when his head laid against the pillow. Slowly, he kissed down his cheeks and the side of his neck, biting lightly by the crook of his shoulders. He sucked a mark there, against the pale skin, leaving Gideon lightly gasping. It bloomed shades of pink, and under the moonlight it looked like a chaste blush.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was pretty convenient, then, that Gideon fell asleep without a shirt that night.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His hand rested on the back of Charles’ head, lightly ruffling his soft hair. Charles reached for Gideon’s other hand, lying limp by a pillow, and laced their fingers together. He continued peppering light kisses down his boyfriend’s body, creating spots of warmth across Gideon’s body, and nuzzled slightly against his soft skin. His free hand massaged his waist, making Gideon jerk slightly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He laughed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gago, alam mo naman na ticklish ako…!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles looked up from his place by Gideon’s belly, a cheeky smile stretched across his face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gusto ko lang kasi marinig tawa mo.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“…Corny mo.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the blush that reached the tips of Gideon’s ears and the fond smile showed how much he thought otherwise.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon tugged lightly on the neck of Charles’ shirt.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles moved back up close above him, and Gideon swore he fell in love even more with this guy who he can’t even declare his love to. The courage and ability to open up what he kept inside was robbed from him that night in that dark room, leaving him troubled with vocalizing deeper truths, or even being a more authentic self. The berry flavored shit he vaped and the endless amount of swears were fronts to try and fit in, and to forget what he held deep in his mind. It never seemed to stop the bullying, yet God forbid he stopped pressing the fire and starting the coil, or taking down his wall of defense armed with curses.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The logician-tactician side to him was, deep inside, consistently disappointed by his efforts to “fit in”, and displayed itself in the form of deflection towards everyone’s insults—truthfully, neither confirming nor denying. Lying was a player’s piece, he knew, but being a jackass isn’t ideal, really. Still, expressing too much vulnerability will prove to have worse ends, and he’d rather work to see better ends. Most of his lies faced his family, what with that usual strict Chinese culture—marry someone, produce a child, continue the family name and blood and business. His mother was only half Chinese, and she was a little more open to the slight femininity of Gideon; his father was pureblood, and he had a section of his closet dedicated to making sure he showed nothing of his true self.</span>
</p><p><span>Thankfully, Gideon’s still able to allow himself his true vulnerability: gestures that spoke of his fondness, actions that showed that he cared, and kisses that told how he loved Charles so dearly, and how much he treasured him </span><em><span>every</span></em> <em><span>fucking</span></em> <em><span>day</span></em><span>. Charles would sometimes have the same trouble, as well, having known love only from his mother.</span></p><p>
  <span>Still, he pulled Charles’ face closer to his, and gently kissed him, thinking. Charles kissed him back a second time.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The proclamation came as just a quiet surprise to the both of them, and instead of pausing too long, they smiled softly instead at each other, pressing on with the night.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles kissed down Gideon’s body once more, while Gideon supplied encouragement and consent in whispers and soft touches. It was every so often that Charles looked back up at him, eyes questioning his own movements, and Gideon understood and appreciated the caution his boyfriend had. It was only around his lower belly that he became conscious, and Charles did his best to avoid the area and give attention to others.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A soft moan replied to a lick across his nipples, and soft growls responded to the small tugs he gave on his boyfriend’s hair. More hickies blossomed around Gideon’s torso while he pulled Charles up to sit so he could tug off his shirt. Soon, Charles was underneath him, and Gideon took his pleasurable time in worshipping Charles’ body. The body of a varsity basketball player was usually just plain buff and large, but Charles had more softness and a little bit of lithe. His biceps were fun to bite, and he had pecs that Gideon adored with his kisses, and by the time he looked down at his work, Charles’ face was red beyond relief to match the same red blooming across his arms and chest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ba’t parang sarap na sarap ka sa katawan ko…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon laughed cheekily.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Masarap, eh! And, I just…missed you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nakita mo ‘ko two days ago.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“‘</span>
  <em>
    <span>Absence makes the heart grow fonder</span>
  </em>
  <span>’ nga, diba?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They both laughed lightly at the quip, their eyes blinking a matching gleam. Charles pulled Gideon closer to him, and peppered kisses around his face once more—over his eyelids, across his cheeks, on his forehead, and at the lips. He may have felt awful and disturbed a while ago after waking up from his nightmare, but in that moment, in the safety of Charles’ arms, showered in affection and reassurance (and corny jokes), Gideon couldn’t help but smile ecstatically against Charles’ lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Soon, the warmth turned back to heat again, and their bodies pressed even closer together. Charles licked into Gideon’s mouth, and received small sucks on his tongue in return. Their kiss grew deeper and deeper as they began to rub their groins against each other. With Gideon on top, Charles didn’t need to worry too much on crossing a boundary—Gideon could set them himself and move the both of them as he pleased. A little submissive in his part, which was probably a contrast to how people would see him in real life, but Charles had a soft spot and it was reserved for his friends and boyfriend.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He settled his hands at the small of his back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Amidst their grinding, their trousers were frantically pulled off, and Gideon plucked out a condom and lube bottle from his bedside drawer. He allowed Charles to prep him, having grown a little tired. It was the middle of the night, after all. Charles paused for a moment before pressing on, just to admire the stark beauty of his boyfriend bare before him. If Gideon noticed, maybe he did preen a little from the attention he was receiving, and Charles loved it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Large slicked fingers prodded Gideon’s entrance, and after a while, a finger became two, then three. Charles became a little more turned on by the heat around his fingers, admittedly, but his arousal was primarily from Gideon beginning to grind on his chest by the second finger. Slick spread over Charles’ chest from the action, making it easier for Gideon to slide against his boyfriend’s body. By the fourth finger, Gideon was limp, sprawled on top of his boyfriend’s chest, and a breathing mess. His grip on Charles’ biceps to ground himself amidst the pleasure loosened, and they both silently agreed that he was fine already.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you want to, or should I?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It took a while for Gideon to answer as his breathing steadied itself. He pulled himself up a bit to look at Charles properly, seeing him hold up the square foil.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ako na lang, it’s fine.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon grabbed the condom from his boyfriend, and Charles watched Gideon’s lithe fingers tear the packet, and slowly slip the lubed condom over his length with precision. Such a simple action probably shouldn’t be making him so aroused, but he watched himself harden in his boyfriend’s hands, and all the more when he stroked more lube over it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He exhaled long and hard, forcing himself to look away. Heat pooled below his stomach.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“God, ang lambot ng kamay mo…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Looking back down, he saw pretty doll eyes peaking over thin lashes, and plump lips red from earlier. Gideon’s pink tongue peaked out and licked a hot stripe along the underside of Charles’s length, and he softly kissed around the edges of his tip.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Tang</span>
  </em>
  <span>ina, fuck… ‘lika na nga dito.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles gestured for Gideon to crawl up to him, and he did, his bare and </span>
  <em>
    <span>very warm</span>
  </em>
  <span> body sliding over him. They met each other with a kiss. His hand slid down the length of his back and settled at the crook of his ass.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can I…?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A finger dipped into Gideon’s entrance once more, very quickly, and was soon replaced by the tip of Charles’ dick. The movement became hesitant, with the round warmth prodding—only </span>
  <em>
    <span>prodding</span>
  </em>
  <span>, fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>nothing</span>
  </em>
  <span> except that, </span>
  <em>
    <span>gods please push it in</span>
  </em>
  <span>—his asshole, teasing—always </span>
  <em>
    <span>teasing</span>
  </em>
  <span>, like </span>
  <em>
    <span>Jesus Christ</span>
  </em>
  <span>, pushed to an </span>
  <em>
    <span>edge</span>
  </em>
  <span>—his arousal.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Please</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles grinned against Gideon’s pouting lips, and his other hand gripped his ass to pull down against his length. Gideon drew a gasp, and he straightened up to a sit. They both initially meant to go slower, but once Gideon sat up, Charles was—</span>
  <em>
    <span>god</span>
  </em>
  <span>, so thick, and </span>
  <em>
    <span>inside</span>
  </em>
  <span>—fully seated into his boyfriend’s—tight, warm, </span>
  <em>
    <span>filled to the brim</span>
  </em>
  <span>—ass, the somewhat loosened up tightness engulfing him in warmth. They were both panting, and grasping each other for steadiness. Charles had his hands gripped tightly on his boyfriend’s thighs, and Gideon’s trembling hands grasped helplessly against his boyfriend’s built chest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Carefully, Charles adjusted himself a little more upright, moving the pillows behind him. He heard Gideon softly moan from the slight movement inside him. Once he was seated back again, he felt his boyfriend grinding against him, chasing the feeling. Slowly, he lifted off from his lap until only Charles’ head was inside him, them sank himself downward again. Charles could only watch as Gideon gently rode him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His flowing need restrained itself while Gideon rolled his already swelled up lip against his teeth, the light sheen of sweat over his naked and flushed torso stark from the light outside the window. His nipples perked up when Charles reached over to mess with them, and Gideon’s soft panting quickly turned into muffled moaning, and his slow ministrations quickened slightly, his need closer to overflowing from the action.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ah, fuck— Ang hilig mo with over-stimulating, my god…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“‘Di pa nga ‘to over-stimulation, eh.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles chuckled, and Gideon struggled to keep down his yelp when his other hand trailed down his sides and gripped around his leaking self. It began slowly pumping, and Charles’ thumb rubbed against its slit.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>! Fuck, puta—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He began chasing after the feeling against his dick, his ass no longer seated against his boyfriend’s lap. This left Charles free to cant his lips upward and into Gideon, slamming into him at an angle, pushing the need past its limit and past the brim of what Gideon could handle each time his dick brushed against that pleasure point. Their unrestrained moans met with low grunts filled the room at each thrust and grind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ch</span>
  <em>
    <span>arle</span>
  </em>
  <span>s—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Gid</span>
  </em>
  <span>—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Their actions grew faster, Charles’ hand jerking Gideon’s length recklessly by then, and Gideon meeting each of Charles’ thrusts into him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles tugged his boyfriend's head downward, and Gideon met his kiss halfway, lips pressing on heightened heat and emotion.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then the pleasure rolled beyond all borders, and turned their visions white as one burrowed deep into the other, and the other shot the overflow of liquid heat on top of one. Their kiss broke, leaving them breathing raggedly into each other’s mouths. They were both frozen in their places entangled in each other, pleasure clogging their brains, with hips still slightly jerking and hands gripping each other tightly. Charles was the first to move, slowly running his hand soothingly up and down Gideon’s back to warm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon’s entire body shivered at the action, and it broke him out of his reverie.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Charles…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Their eyes met, one still vaguely blissed out, clearly not even processing his hand’s movement against the other’s back, while the other was a little more alert, and maybe a little embarrassed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uhm…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon carefully lifted himself from Charles’ length, a small gasp leaving him at the light drag he felt against his still-sensitive entrance. Immediately, coolness met his whole body from it, and he shivered again. Having a longer body, it was just a little bit awkward for Gideon when trying to get off of Charles’ bigger build. However, Charles always easily responded to it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles immediately held Gideon’s back firmly after having carressed it, his eyes clicking back to attentiveness. His other hand settled at his hip to steady him as he climbed off, and he moved to hover over him as he helped lie him down.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I got you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A hand brushed Gideon’s hair up and away from his face, and ended up cupped on his cheek. It made him smile softly back at his boyfriend’s caring eyes, the soft warmth of security from earlier blossoming in his heart even as the hand slipped away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You always do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles smiled warmly back, and Gideon watched him get off the bed to clean up, removing and tying the condom to throw in the waste bin before slipping into the bathroom to wet a towel. A slow and lethargic blink later, and Charles was suddenly in front of him again, wiping down the sweat and other fluids from every nook and cranny of his body. On a normal day, Gideon would’ve loved to take a shower after any sort of activity, always preferring to be clean and rid of any phantom touches from the day from strangers. However, in the careful hands of the man he loves, he let himself slip, and drifted to sleep, soft thoughts muddling his mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>— –</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon blearily woke up for a flash of a moment when Charles got off the bed and dressed up. He vaguely recalls a warm press of the lips on his forehead before he let himself go back to sleep.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>About an hour later, he wakes up again, and gets up for real this time. Gideon idly combed at his hair with his hand, sitting up and looking about the room. Recalling that he actually didn’t sleep with a shirt on, he decidedly gets up to pull one on from his closet, and follows the scent of bacon to the kitchen. There, Charles is only just finishing up cooking breakfast, with sinangag in one pan and bacon &amp; eggs in another. Gideon approached without a sound, but his boyfriend doesn’t startle in the slightest when his chin leans down to rest on his shoulder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Smells good.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Only the best for you, babe”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles glances at him with a timid smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“…How are you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Parang ako dapat nagtatanong niyan.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A beat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean, was your sleep good naman?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ayos lang ako, Gid.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sorry if I made you puyat…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles lightly snickered at the very conyo statement. He turned off the burner, having already finished, and turned around to carefully look into his boyfriend’s eyes. They attempted to steel up, but still held the vulnerability that Gideon couldn’t help but reveal to Charles.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Huy, ‘wag. You’re worth being puyat over. Tsaka ‘di naman ako napuyat.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another beat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gideon managed to sheepishly smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Pero okay ka lang ba, Gideon? Parang matagal-tagal ka na ‘di nagkaka-episode… I hope it wasn’t that </span>
  <em>
    <span>nightmare</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He shook his head.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nag-flood back lang ‘yung mga memories after my nightmare and I broke down. Pero I’m fine now, thanks to you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They smiled at each other warmly, and held each other in their arms tightly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charles kisses Gideon’s temple, and turns back to the two pans to set them. The kitchen island counter already had two plates with utensils set, and so Gideon moves over to pull out two glasses from the drawer and a carton of milk from the refrigerator to drink. Charles walks around him effortlessly, and accurately divides their food between each other. They sit together, their shoulders and arms brushing, the both of them smiling at each other. Charles leans in to press a kiss on Gideon’s cheek, whispering melodies to his skin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The warm sunlight filtered in from the large windows of the kitchen, filling the not-so-empty home.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>— –</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ibang anyo sa karamihan…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Iba rin ‘pag tayo lang, iba rin ‘pag tayo lang…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Kung maging tayo, sa’yo lang ang puso ko.</span>
  </em>
</p>
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